The best way to advise someone

Hey good people!

I hope you've had yet another fruitful week

I know you signed up for content about how to start and grow your side hustle and are wondering how the “advice” bit deserves our attention. Let me explain. As you grow into a successful entrepreneur in this case digitalpreneur, people will from time to time come to you to advise them about things and I mean a lot of things. They’ll come to you for recommendations, ask you to make comparisons and derive at a decision etc.People will come to you for advise because you are where they want to be ,headed to where they want to be ,see potential in you that you'll be in such a good place. They’ll come to you for advice on relationships, business and investment, career, faith, social and entertainment etc . And every time they ought to leave the conversation better than they came to it and not the other way round. How do I know this?

Over two months ago, a friend asked me for advice on whether he should invest his $5000 savings in starting a faceless YouTube channel or look at options (which he had populated well before he inquired from me). He explained to me everything that's going around his life and I was supposed to advise him so he can derive his next decision. Long story short, I did and he left the conversation feeling I'm a better “advisor” 🤓🤓. I will not say out how I advised him but to give you a hint, he didn't do the faceless YouTube channel. For further context, I was supposed to be the consultant on that Channel so averagely me and my team would have an additional $500 per month for the next 12 months . Long story short 🤦🏽‍♂️, I thought I could share some of the core pointers I believe you should look at before you advise someone. I believe it’ll come in handy on your entrepreneurial journey . I think this is what my friend Ray (he’s a youTuber too doing great content teaching & inspiring the next big videographer & cinematographer. Check out his channel :- https://youtube.com/@raymosesmajanga) refers to as self development in his case ; for videographers . So without wasting time , let’s have it 🕺🕺

Be a listener

In her commencement speech to Harvard graduates class of 2013 , Oprah Winfrey emphasized the importance of being a listener. In what I believe is one of the most powerful and knowledgeable speeches I’ve watched to this day ( see it here :- https://youtu.be/GMWFieBGR7c) , Oprah hinted about how she’s interviewed several influential figures ranging from artists like Beyoncé , politicians like the former president of the US Barack Obama , terror organization leaders like the leader of the KKK among others. She said that at the end of every interview, every of her interviewees sought to know wether they’d been heard. So pointer no. 1 is that listen to people . It’s only then you’ll best advise them .

Give people advice consistent with their context

Have you ever got advice from someone and fully you feel their advice is not right for you under your circumstances ? It could be because they didn’t “hear” you or are not alive to your reality . I’ll give you an example . The people around me know that recently I developed an allergic reaction to wheat, they just don’t know to what extent. Afew seconds after I’ve eaten anything with wheat , my skin starts to itch .A while ago , my team mates in Nigeria used to bring me snacks , bread & cakes at home , for me to enjoy really . And everytime they’d get utterly disappointed that I’d send them out of the house with the snacks ( in a jokingly but serious way . I hope you understand 😀) . In their defense, they felt that I was being too dramatic about this that a small piece of cake can’t cause so much of harm . Obviously they deliberately do it these days too because they like sitting out of the house enjoying fresh air . So when they don’t want me to bother them with what we’ve to do and my usual motivational talks of how we’re going to become big , they bring snacks or bread or cakes . And you know what I do ? You’re right , I send them out (again not in a rude way) . And then they go to enjoy the fresh air and away from my grass to riches motivational talks . What you pick from this is that then they’d advise me to eat cake anyway , they just didn’t know my context that much . If they did , May be the advice would’ve been different.

Validate people

In Last weeks newsletter, I quoted one of the best books I’ve read to this point ; How to win friends and influence people ( you can find it here :- https://amzn.to/3PyjOLc). In that book , Dale Carnegie emphasized the importance of approaching people from a point of their want . In this case , validating people creates more trust. When someone trusts you, they open up more & that helps you to advise them even better since you’ve more information. And because the person trusts you ,it’s close to impossible for them not to take your advice. It works like magic .

It’s okay not to give advice sometimes

Have you ever been at a point where you feel you don’t have ample knowledge about what you’re being asked ? Are not in the right mental health to advise someone, don’t feel like it ? That’s the point you shouldn’t . Remember we agreed that someone should be better after your conversation than they came to it . If you’re not going to add value to someone , then better do nothing . As the motivational quote says , “It’s all or nothing” .

With that said , I hope you got ample value from this weeks issue . Reply to this email and tell me what you consider before giving someone that million dollar advice.

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With Love ❤️ , Denis !

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